The housing ball is finally rolling..

So after a phone call with on post housing and a phone call with our Realtor, the housing ball is finally rolling.

As soon as Tim comes home we will go look at some homes in the Fort Hood area and find one that is perfect for us. Our Realtor is retired military and a friend of Tim's mother, so he told us he'll take care of us. We aren't very concerned with the number of rooms or the square footage, it will be a temporary living arrangement, we are most concerned about location. If I have to pay more for a two bedroom in a safe area, compared to paying the same for a three bedroom in a less safe neighborhood, you best believe I'll let my children sleep in the same room. Shoot, I'm not even against having all four of us in the same room if it means we won't be having the cops circling our block countless times a week!

I have heard from many individuals that Killeen can be a VERY iffy place to live and to make sure the neighborhoods are nice. Thankfully our Realtor works with military families up there on a regular basis and knows all the good places from the bad.

The housing wait for a three bedroom on post is 3-4 months. Tim can't apply for on post housing til he reports and he won't be reporting til a week after he comes home. The shortest lease up that way is 6 months, so we will be finding somewhere to live for 6 months and at the end of our lease we will move on post. The woman that I spoke to earlier today told me that the government has set up an arrangement with the property owners in the surrounding area that they won't allow families to break their leases early to move on post. So if a house was to become available before the end of our lease, they would hold a house for us so the day our lease ended, we could move in.

It's nice that things are falling into place. Now..we just need to get my husband home!

236

It has been 236 days since I dropped my husband off at the recruiting station in Georgetown and drove away with a heavy stream of black mascara and eye liner running down my face. My lovely husband had bought me new makeup and failed to buy waterproof but I still wore it, even though I knew what would be the end result. 

I can't believe that by the time this is over..he will have been gone over 8 months. I look back and honestly..it flew by. I can only hope and pray that I get the same fast results with a deployment as I have with training. Honestly..we are ONLY 4 months short of a deployment. The major difference between the two is that during a 12 month deployment he'd only be home for 2 weeks for RR, unlike our multiple visits during training. So yes, I realize that they are nothing the same..nor is the stress that comes along with the two. But time wise...wow, it's flown by.

I'm eager to have my husband home and get our family back to functioning as a complete set, rather than a family separated. I have heard stories and have experienced it a bit myself, how different it will be at first. It may be hard but then again it may not, we'll just have to play it out and see. I've gotten use to flying solo while he's gotten use to not having to worry about the little things..like leaving a pen laying on the desk..or leaving the toilet seat up. ;)

I'm excited for us to finally move to Ft Hood, to finally live in our own place again. I'm ready to function as a family of four and be able to go to the pool on the weekends or to the movies, I'm ready for the family activities. It's the little things you don't notice until they are taken away..the simple things. I'm ready to be able to wake up next to my husband and have our girls crawl into bed with us like they use to do on the weekends. I'm ready to be able to sleep through the night, without having to roll over at 2am to make sure I haven't missed a phone call or text. I'm excited that one of the first things we will be doing when he comes home, is going to Sea World with the girls. Sea World allows military families a free one day pass every year, and we can't wait to use ours!

I know deployments are looming in our very near future, we expect him to be deployed before February, but I am trying to not think about that just yet. I want to be able to relax and enjoy the time I have with my husband, before he has to leave again. I want to make as many memories with him and our girls, as we can before he has to leave again. Those memories are what you cling on to, because you know that the loneliness won't always be there.  I know that God has a plan and I'm trying to trust completely on that. 

Tomorrow will be 11 days and a wakeup til Tim graduates and we drive back to Texas. I'm ready!

Thank you for the prayers, it was a very scary day.

At 3:45 am, this morning, I received a very frantic phone call from Tim's younger sister Michelle. She was calling to tell me that their mother had fallen down the flight of stairs in their home and Michelle had rushed her to the hospital that is a 1/4 mile down the road from their home.

Sandy suffered multiple concussions, a broken nose and a shattered wrist. The hospital ran 2 ct scans on her to make sure she didn't have any skull fractures. She hit her head multiple times with the fall and black outs following, so they wanted to be positive. (She blacked out and hit her head as she was trying to sit at the kitchen table following her fall.)

Sandy came to the conclusion that she must of been sleep walking because all she can remember is falling down the stairs and her head bouncing as it hit the tile at the bottom of the stairs. The doctors told her that she would of had worse head trauma had she not of tried to catch herself with her hand.

Despite what happened, she looked incredible when the girls and I went to visit her at the hospital. She didn't have any bruising..but was in very obvious discomfort, even with a morphine drip.

I want to thank everyone who lifted her, and the family, up in prayer today. The whole situation could of been a million times worse had Michelle not of been home or had she not of heard her fall down the stairs.

So thank you, to those who prayed for her. Please continue to pray that she has a speedy recovery.

Goodbye, my big ugly friend.

Today, I lost a piece of myself...a piece I liked to call 'my big ugly friend'

After five years of being close buddies, today I went to the dermatologist and they sliced him right off.

Haha, alright for reals though, today I went to the dermatologist and finally had a mole removed from my scalp that I have had since shortly after graduating from Stony Point back in 2005. It was big, it was ugly and I wanted it gone.

So today..thanks to TriCare and Spicewood Dermatology..that sucker is gone. Finally I can pull my hair back without needing the habit I developed of pulling down a piece of hair to cover it. I now have a small little bald spot on my scalp, which you can't see cause the hair covers it. I also can't wash my hair for 24 hours and I have to put Neosporin on it for two weeks. Yay for greasy nasty hair.

Ugh, I need a moment

I doubt I'll even post this when I'm done writing it. I just need to vent. Now that I've said that..I better write this well..because I'll post it just to prove that I can.

I feel like I have genuinely handled the past 7 months in an amazing manner. I don't cry, I don't pout, I don't throw pity parties and hate my life. I don't yell at my husband for leaving me, I don't blame my bad days on him. I don't regret him leaving, I support him every single day. You'll rarely hear me complain about our current situation and any situation that the Army has thrown at us to date. I say this because throughout the years you hear stories of women doing such things, and being angry at their husbands for leaving them alone.

I have bad days from time to time..but those are far and few between. My good days drastically outnumber my hard ones, but with that said..I still have bad days, mainly bad nights.

So much has changed since he's been gone..our girls have grown so much in the past 7 months, more so than I expected them to. Most of the change is in Madison. When he left she was still in diapers, drank out of a sippy cup, sat in a high chair, wore a bib occasionally, woke up 3-4 times a night and wasn't much of a talker. Now she is day time potty trained, drinks out of a cup, sits at the table, sleeps throughout the night and is talking up a storm. She is in need of her first haircut but I refuse to do it with Tim away, I want him there for it.

I miss him, I want him home more than anything in this world. It's hard not having him around when the house gets quiet and the kids are asleep. It gets hard doing this every day by myself, it gets lonely. I'm ready to have my other half back..I'm ready for my girls to have their daddy home.

 I can't stand to hear women complain that their husbands are working late and they are 'so lonely' or that their husbands went on a camping trip for a weekend and they don't know what they are going to do. I know this is the life we chose, but sometimes I just want to slap them and tell them to suck it up. It's the petty attitude inside of me, I don't judge these women..just want them to be grateful for what they have, that they will see their husbands in a few hours or a few days. I'm sure there are women out there who grow tired of hearing me complain about him being away when I have seen him every few months since he's been gone. I know they go year long deployments without seeing their spouse and I have no right to complain and because of this I try to keep my complaints to a minimum.

Tonight is a hard night. I want him home..but I know that when he finally gets here..it just starts the countdown til deployment. I know deployment is going to be a million times harder than what we are feeling right now. My heart aches, I miss him and want him back. I miss my best friend.

Happy Anniversary.

The words were awesome.

'Baby, they moved graduation...it'll be on the 8th instead of the 15th, we'll be together for our anniversary!'

How awesome is that?! While I wished they had moved graduation to the 1st so we could spend our anniversary AND the 4th together...I'm definitely not complaining. I was worried we wouldn't be together this year..and then possibly next year as well. I'm mentally preparing myself for him to be deployed for our five year anniversary, so it's nice that we'll at least be together this year and not miss two in a row.

So its 25 days and a wake up til his graduation and I'm excited.

We will be making the very long drive, 14 hours, on Wednesday..watching him graduate Thursday morning and then immediately after we'll jump in the car for the long drive back. So lots of money, lots of car time and lots of stress for a 30 minute ceremony. Hey Tim, if you're reading this..don't ever doubt our love for you!

It'll be monsoon season in Arizona at that time..don't believe me? Look it up..
"In Arizona, as in other regions of the world including India and Thailand, we experience a monsoon, a season of high temperatures, high winds, and high moisture, resulting in potentially deadly weather.

June 15 will be the first day of the monsoon, and September 30 will be the last day.

Monsoon storms range from minor dust storms to violent thunderstorms. They can even spawn tornadoes, though that is very rare. Typically, Arizona monsoon storms start with heavy winds sometimes resulting in a visible wall of dust hundreds of feet high moving across the Valley. These dust storms are normally accompanied by frequent thunder and lightning often leading to heavy downpours. Monsoon rains average about 2-1/2", about 1/3 of our yearly rainfall."

I'm not looking forward to that at all. When we drove to Arizona in April we drove through two large sand storms. I'm talking about doing 15 mph on the highway in a 75mph speed zone, because we couldn't see 30 feet infront of us and large semi trucks were being blown off the road. It was crazy. Tim has already told me that the weather is getting bad up there, the wind is starting to pick up. Hooray....

::deep sigh::

::breathe in::

::breathe out::

I can finally breathe again, at least for a short bit.

Tim passed his FINAL test today, knocked that sucker out of the water with a 100%. No more tests...no more studying..no more note taking..no more freaking waiting anxiously all day to hear how his test went, no more classes!

He has his last class on Monday, and then FTX from the 15th through the 23rd, then GRADUATION!! My husband will be an intelligence analyst in the United States Army!

It's nice to be able to breathe for a bit without any concerns over tests. I can't believe that next month he'll be graduating and coming home with me. That is when the real worrying will begin...deployments. But as of right now..I breathe and I thank God.